Graphical Manipulations #85: Nounery, Lies, More Lies, Blow Ups, That Rat, And – That Wink!

Beneath the ebullient manner of the Graphical Manipulatorist lies hidden, a deep dark and almost mind-numbing fear.  Well actually, it is mind-numbing, but the ‘almost’ is for effect. OK?  Anyhow, that mind-numbing fear is, that, one day, there will sit the perfect graphic and your mind will go blank, or, even worse there will be no silly event, and no accompanying graphic to which your mind will have no opportunity to go blank upon – if you see what I mean.  Pleased I am to have the confident assurance that that is just not going to happen with the current government!!

With all the grace and aplomb of an elephant dancing the lead role in “Swan Lake” the Federal Government, aka The NO Coalition, aka the NO Coaliars have truly excelled themselves in, metaphorically speaking, turning a beautiful ballet into the tinny crash of cymbals, the braying of discordant horns accompanied by the pathetic bleating of sheep oppressively pervaded over by the stench of elephant poo!  More succinctly put, the NO Coaliars have fucked up – big time!

So many cock-ups, so many graphics.  This week has provided this little GM with enough material to cover at least three or four weeks, and endless repititions.  Given the current cock-up trend the surfeit is pretty assured of continuance.  Now we just have to find the right words, eh?

Firstly we have our illustrious government trying to convince us that they didn’t lie to get themselves elected.  Collective nounery came immediately to mind;

Collective Nounery Liars

And being of a pensionable age and thinking entirely of self we considered the possible dietary future;

Pensioner Doggy Food

And then thoughts of those voters who considered that a party using the descriptive term “Liberal” were actually that;

Sucker Bait

I’ll wager you’re now thinking that there’s an “e” missing somewhere in Liberal, aren’t you?

Thoughts of all that welfare largesse being removed from all those free-loaders led, naturally, to that imposing figure of a man who laid it all on the table on budget night;

Overblown Hockey

At the mention of Mr Eleventy the Rat came bounding out to appraise us of Joe’s dancing skills;

Dancing Hockey Rat

He wondered what it might be like to be a “fat and happy” public servant in a few months time;

Fat and Happy Rat

And impressed he was with George’s “Suck it up, Princess” view of those who saw the budget as a bit threatening;

Stop Complaining Rat

And finally, after all this time, how Tony and Joe still haven’t figured out that; firstly, if you are going to lie you need a good memory and; secondly, if you do lie then make sure there’s no-one around to contradict you;

Triple A Rat

After the Rat’s mirthy look at the week’s happenings thoughts turned to how to lead from the Rat smoothly into a snide GM on THAT WINK!  Not having a clue we just went straight at it with;

Sex and the Abbott

Then found we couldn’t leave it alone and came back at it with;

The Winky Dill

And all those thoughts led ultimately to this;

Hung Out To Dry

And there you have it!

Afterthought:  The Australians appear to a man to regard their politicians as time-serving crooks or simple-minded hirelings. (Jim Cameron). Jim! You are so on the money!!

Postscript:  All characters appearing in this work are entirely, and amazingly, fictitious.  Any resemblance to real persons, living, dead or in a zombie like state, is purely coincidental with an exceptionally high probability of being the construct of a deluded mind trying to grasp the true meaning of the political unreality of Australian politics, al la NO Coalition!  We can only gaze upon such greatness with wonderment!














About deknarf

Australian born and bred who has spent most of his working life in R&D and IP management with earlier forays in the newspaper industry and martial arts. Fortunate enough to be living in one of the best countries in the World, even though I might get grumpy with it from time to time.
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7 Responses to Graphical Manipulations #85: Nounery, Lies, More Lies, Blow Ups, That Rat, And – That Wink!

  1. joy cooper says:

    Top GMs as per, Deknarf. 🙂

    As for collective nouns there are heaps that could be put into use for these twerps. Such as a parliament of prevaricators, a murder of morons, a sloth of simpletons, a bellowing of blunderers etc etc.

    Keep up the good work. You certainly will never be short of material with this mob of boneheads.


    • deknarf says:

      Good one’s Joy! You need to be collective nounering AND graphically manipulating!!
      The NO Coaliars certainly seem intent on providing a wealth of ‘good stuff’. Though it makes one shudder to think that the Oz voters elected such clowns to govern the country!


      • joy cooper says:

        Yes, the LNP will continue to make Australia the laughing stock of the universe. How on earth they could be so incompetent when all of their cabinet were in Howard’s government & many of them ministers even then. Shows how bad that government was.

        Still cannot understand how 47% of voters would still vote for them!!!


  2. Now I understand D! When Tones keep rabbiting on about a surplus, he wasn’t talking about the Budget at all! He was talking about a surplus of stupidity! Silly me. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I haff to tell ze dryfer wheere to pork the core.
    Luff your work,
    Matty C.


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