Graphical Manipulations #169: An Election! An Election! We’re Having An Erection! Noooooooooo!!


And so it begins. Welcome to fifty-four (that’s 54) days of excruciating TV, of pollsters polling and saying sooths about said results.  Of interminable explanations of the possible ramifications of a 1 percentage point change in a poll with a 3 percent margin of error!

Of a mainstream media intent solely on the headline regardless of factuality and driven by the editorial instructions (“Hi Rupert!”) to propagandise surreality and lead the sheeple in the preferred voting direction (“We’re all your’s Rupert!”).

Of commentators commenting on every word said, reading between the lines, extrapolating the implications and examining the portents and signs. If you haven’t switched off by day 5 and started watching replays of “Yes Minister” for some light relief, you’re liable to need intensive psychological care and enough Valium to numb your brain up until July 2.  I’m thinking liquids containing at least 12% alcohol have the potential to be a viable alternative!

Now to overcome the problem of smooth segue from that to the next bit! I know!  I know!!

Well see admissions of frailty by those wishing to prostrate themselves before the electorate in the hope of capturing enough votes to return them to the Canberran Troughs of Largesse. Like for example our recently displaced Prime Minister, aka, the Wacko Warringah Wabbott!

Abbott Admission Uhuh Rat

And who could ignore Sophie Mirabella’s outburst of angst against those nasty little voters of Indi who had the temerity to elect someone else to HER sinecure! Goddamn plebs we should take their vote off them!!

Sophie Big Mouth

Hidden away alongside the “Stop the Boats” three word slogan policy we found another, equally relevant, once realisation smacks the Lieberal Party in the mouth that Anthropogenic Global Warming just ain’t going to go away just by engaging the “wishful thinking” brain cells.

Sealism Penguin Stop

Which brings us to those intellectual giants Fiona Nash and George (bookcase) Brandis’ views on the the issue of climate change, aka, global warming, aka, anthropogenic global warming.

AGW Nash Brandis Toads

That Bloody Rat, was considerably more impressed with the strength of the current Prime Minister (that’s Malcolm Turnbull) and the current Treasurer (that’s Scott Morrison) who got those disreputable bankers in a room and gave them a good talking too!

Banking Rat

He was also most tickled by the assistance provided to DEPUTY PRIME MINISTER Barnaby Joyce to assist him in keeping his foot out of his mouth during an election.

Joyce Trainer Rat

We also found ourselves increasingly concerned with the nature of ephemera because we had seen so many of these during the previous election which had, well, disappeared!

Ephemeral Promissory Notes

And it was noticed that as the election fervour was racked up a notch or two we started to get an increase in the level of furious defence of the indefensible, leading to raucousness.

Negative Gearing Howler

The meter was showing extreme levels of bullshit raising concerns that, at those levels, measurement accuracy was now doubtful!  In fact, similar to that of election polling.

Bullshit Meter

It was also noticed that the more recently acquired Turnbullshit meter was also operating at peak level.

Turnbullshit Meter

Although accuracy of measurement is now dubious these levels are extremely concerning, and can only be expected to worsen. As certain as anthropogenic global warming you might say!.

This has led to the following warning being made current over the sunburnt country! The populace is advised to put their tinfoil hats on NOW!!

Intelligence Free Zone Map

And there you have it . . . . . . . .!

AFTERTHOUGHT: If you don’t punish politicians and their parties for lying to you, you are predetermining your treatment as a fool!

 

AFTER-AFTERTHOUGHT: This Lieberal/Neutered Puppy Coalition Government is trashing the good standing of Australia. It cares little about its people in its fanatical pursuit of ultra-conservative ideology. It is using the weapons of minority xenophobia, the secret fears and uncertainty of the general public and blatant propaganda, aided by a complaisant media, to turn this country into something is has never been – bigoted, racist, xenophobic, selfish, self-indulgent, self-obsessed, uncaring and a disgrace to all those things that have made Australia a great country! Tolerance, mateship, community, fairness and equity, honesty and a love of freedom in both speech and expression!

POSTSCRIPT: All characters appearing in this work are entirely, and amazingly, fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living, dead or in a zombie like state, is purely coincidental with an exceptionally high probability of being the construct of a deluded mind trying to grasp the true meaning of the political unreality of Australian politics! We can only gaze upon such greatness with wonderment!

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About deknarf

Australian born and bred who has spent most of his working life in R&D and IP management with earlier forays in the newspaper industry and martial arts. Fortunate enough to be living in one of the best countries in the World, even though I might get grumpy with it from time to time.
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