Graphical Manipulations #93: Small Steps, Freedom, Books, Ratticisms, Jobs And Monkey Business!


It’s been a bleak and tragic week passed made much worse by blatant brutality, machinations, cover-up and political opportunism. We can only think gently of those who lost loved ones and hope that the lost will requiescat in pace.

Such thoughts led to darker thoughts about dirty secret dealings much closer to home and how easy it is when treating others with contempt to become contemptible in your treatment of others;

Small Steps

And that led to thinking about those who would participate in the perpetration of such deeds;

Intellectual Minnows

Freedom of speech led to thoughts of words, lots of word, and getting them in the right order and that, naturally, led to thoughts of books, well a couple of them anyhow;

Big Joke Hockey Book

And this one;

Innumerate Hockey Book

PS: The respective authorships will be recognisable by the cognoscenti amongst us!

Then that Bloody Rat decided that it was time for a more erudite perspective on froot loopery;

Lanfranchi Rat

On how Rat endeavours to maintain a bipartisan demeanour in his Ratty opinionation about both sides of politics, especially when he dislikes, with venomous viciousness, the so-called Leader of the Opposition;

Shorten Hockey Rat

And Rat just couldn’t go past the revelation about just who is in charge of Australia without making comment;

Mudoch PPP Rat

We couldn’t go past the joke (just a tad manipulated to be Oz relevant) found in our desk calendar and how aptly relevant it was to the job creation fury Australia is currently undergoing under this fantastic government led so perfectly by our very own Prime Winky Dill;

Abbotts Job Creation

There was a bit more Monkey Business;

Morrison Gibberish 2

And of course, a final appearance by our ever alert Tony Abbott;

Says it all Abbott

And there you have it . . . . . . . .!

AFTERTHOUGHT:  If you don’t punish politicians and their parties for lying to you, you are predetermining your treatment as a fool!

POSTSCRIPT:  All characters appearing in this work are entirely, and amazingly, fictitious.  Any resemblance to real persons, living, dead or in a zombie like state, is purely coincidental with an exceptionally high probability of being the construct of a deluded mind trying to grasp the true meaning of the political unreality of Australian politics, al la NO Coalition!  We can only gaze upon such greatness with wonderment!

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Graphical Manipulations #92: Idiots, Honesty, Lies, The Rat, Lamb Roast, And Other Bits!


Word around the traps, within the Lieberal Party and its associated Neutered Puppies, is that to maintain consistency with the Three Word Slogan (TWS to the cognoscenti) policy, all future speeches will consist solely of three word sentences.  It’s hoped that this overall uniformity will further assist in lulling the swingeing voters into a mind numbing sense of absolute futility and an overwhelming desire to vote conservative (excluding PUPs and other fringe RWP (that’s Right Wing Ponces).

As there is already a TLA (Three Word Acronym for the non-cognoscenti) for the TWS which conflicts with the potential acronym for the three word sentence (TWS for the not so sharp – hence the conflict), an internal competition has begun to come up with an appropriate TLA that does not conflict with the current TWS.  The winner of the competition will be given a FBS (that’s Front Bench Seat) and a PPP (that’s Personally Picked Portfolio).

So let’s try.  Howdy there Leaners.  Great week, eh?  Not much politicking. Parliament House deserted.  Abbott looked good!  Put down Putin.  Looked very patriarchal.  Dismal failure though!  Adage very true.  Can’t polish turds!

Morrison very upset.  Dictionary, thesaurus confiscated.  New policy forbids.  Bookcase will go.  Graphical Manipulation opportunities? Opportunistic moments abounded!  Let’s go there!!

I have a strange suspicion that the Liberal criteria for Senator selection (especially in Queensland) has requirements in it that prospective Senators have an IQ of less than 90 and a small, nasty and narrow mind.  Don’t believe me?  What more proof do you require;

Another Nasty Liberal

Ahhhh! Kathy Jackson, ever the noble fighter for the rights of her beleaguered union brothers and sisters.  Fighting the good fight, and making sure that she looks beautifully manicured (on other people’s money) while doing so;

Jackson Tiger Snake

As we haven’t heard any rumblings about challenges to our Prime Winky Dill, given his atrocious polling, starting one of our own seemed appropriate;

Popular Abbott

Unable to be contained, that Wascally Widdle Wat added a few insights of his own, on Julie Bishop showing her tough, diplomatic ‘foot in mouth’ side;

Bishop Bluff Rat

And Joe (Eleventy) Hockey’s little hissy fit at a recalcitrant @#%^*&@ Senate full of recalcitrant @#%^*&@ non-complaiant @#%^*&@ unrepresentative swill @#%^*&@ Senators

Policy Joe Rat

Was impress with Tony telling Vlad where to get off.  Wonder why he never told us all the right things that Vlad said;

Putin Speaks Rat

Rat was particularly impressed with the potential, possible, maybe, perhaps, perhaps, well, never in living memory, bonus from the repeal of the Great Big Tax;

Shortchanged Rat

At that point we just couldn’t pass by Barnaby Joyce’s claim of $100 lamb legs without a passing some sort of anal, sorry banal, comment;

Global Warming Lamb

We felt a little sorry for Tony’s “Gillard Fate’ in having to deal with an obstreperous and difficult Senate minority – for about a femto-second;

Senate Rain Parade

And that brought about thoughts of all those promises made, and all those promises kept, and;

Redeemer Abbott

At that point, and just for a brief moment, a whiff of religious adage swept in while considering polls with “AS YE SOW, SO SHALL YE REAP!!”, or words to that effect;

Trustworty Tony

And then Rupert Murdoch came a long and rained on everyone’s parade by letting the business community know exactly what he thought of politicians;

Monkey Business Rupert

And there you have it . . . . . . . .!

AFTERTHOUGHT:  If you don’t punish politicians and their parties for lying to you, you are predetermining your treatment as a fool!

POSTSCRIPT:  All characters appearing in this work are entirely, and amazingly, fictitious.  Any resemblance to real persons, living, dead or in a zombie like state, is purely coincidental with an exceptionally high probability of being the construct of a deluded mind trying to grasp the true meaning of the political unreality of Australian politics, al la NO Coalition!  We can only gaze upon such greatness with wonderment!

 

 

 

 

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Graphical Manipulations #91: Leaners, Solutions, Solutioners, Star Wars, The Rat, Bosses And Pledges


Greetings fellow “Leaners”, mutual imbibers from the public teat of Government largesse.  One hopes that your week was as interestingly lactic as was mine!  We saw the Senate in denial that the week had been farcical.  We saw the Prime Winky Dill in denial that the Senate was a bloody mess with grim premonitions that it will turn into a complete and utter debacle.  We saw several PUPS and the head dog in denial that anything was amiss.  We saw our illustrious govmint in denial that there was anything to deny or that anything was amiss.  All in all a bit of a NO NO week you might say.  But under every every dank dollop of denial there are always the gems of satirical opportunity just awaiting the revelation of the Graphical Manipulator.  So, I present to you, the intelligent readers of this tyro of a blog, my humble, nay kow-towing attempts at capturing in a carefully manipulated graphic image the very essence of the quirky mind melding with the digital into a harmonious expression of the id, the ego and the alter ego all expressed in an outpouring of mental expression!  PS: Many thanks to Scott Morrison for his help with the last sentence.

We saw this little graphic somewhere and felt that while it told a story about the distribution of wealth in this country, it didn’t really tell it all;

Leaner Population

And naturally that led to thoughts about those “Leaning” pensioners and the grand plan (nay Solution) that our illustrious government has for them;

Coalition Solution

That led to thoughts about Final Solutions, variously perpetrated, by various dictatorial perpetrators on various minority groups (appropriately vilified) which led to;

Pick the Diff

We were taken by people who somewhat resemble science fiction film characters confirming the resemblance by making disparaging remarks about climate science and fictionalisation whilst resembling a fictional character in said science fiction;

Jabba Speaks

The Bloody Rat thinking we had stolen a march on climate issues then rampaged in with the Murdoch take on a global disaster that he’ll never get to see with;

AGW Rupert Rat

PS:  No idea where that extra ‘e’ came from but I’m sure there’s a mystical reason for it somewhere.

The Rat then pointed out that Julie Bishop’s foray into the fine are of diplomacy was going pretty well,  if you used the ire of the Chinese as a measure of AAA performance;

Foolish Bishop Rat

Rat was particularly impressed by Scott Morrison’s skills in the art of gobbledegook spoken in Gibberish;

Morrison Gibberish Rat

That Rupert Murdoch certainly knew how to take the measure of a man especially one that does as he’s told, when he’s told;

Principled Abbott Rat

It was felt that stereotyping our Prime Winky Dill would probably be a task well beyond the intellectual capacities of geniuses so he didn’t really have to ask not to be;

Stereotype Abbott Rat

Naturally (after restraining the rat) and considering all that praise of our illustrious ‘well it’s business as usual in the Senate’ Prime Minister in denial, we wondered how his Prime Brain was dealing with the current situation;

Force Majeure Credlin

And that led, ultimately, to pledges by political leaders and the infinite capacity for such people to put their foot regularly in their mouth and talk at the same time;

Pledging Abbott

And there you have it . . . . . . . .!

AFTERTHOUGHT:  If you don’t punish politicians and their parties for lying to you, you are predetermining your treatment as a fool!

POSTSCRIPT:  All characters appearing in this work are entirely, and amazingly, fictitious.  Any resemblance to real persons, living, dead or in a zombie like state, is purely coincidental with an exceptionally high probability of being the construct of a deluded mind trying to grasp the true meaning of the political unreality of Australian politics, al la NO Coalition!  We can only gaze upon such greatness with wonderment!

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Graphical Manipulations #90: NO, Money, The Bloody Rat, Whiteboards, Disappearances, Gobbledeish And Swill!


Greetings fellow “Leaners”.  Yep! I’m talking at you!  And how do I know you’re a “leaner”?  Easy, peasy!  Because Joe (Eleventy) Hockey has provided me with the simplest of definitions.  And that is: “Leaner (noun).  A lazy, free-loading, no-good, do-nothing loafer who is in receipt of any form of benefit from Australia’s long-suffering, wonderfully beneficent NO Coalition government.”  That’s the one that has a BIG BUDGET EMERGENCY and a PROBLEM WITH LYING.

Such “Leaning” people are particularly epitomised by the elderly self-indulgent pensioner, the greedy student, the disabled, the young unemployed with delusions of living a fruitful life, parents who want government benefits for their children including a quality education and finally wimpy sicko’s who have the nerve to desire medical treatment.  The gall of these people is beyond belief!

I’m advised that the list is not yet finalised since the present definition may, incorrectly, include those who should, by virtue of their pro-NO Coalition tendencies and high incomes, be more appropriately classified as “Lifters”.  Rumour is that the difference between “Leaners” and “Lifters” is to be determined by whether you use a tax minimisation accountant to do your returns, or not!

There’s also an uncomfortable feeling that there’s something missing from the L and L appellation, and that’s and extra L word.  After much thought, particularly about politicians, I suspect that that word is Lamprey!  “Leaners, Lifters, Lampreys!” has such a nice ring to it when you consider that;  ‘Lampreys are an order of jawlessfish, the adult of which is characterized by a toothed, funnel-like sucking mouth.  Currently there are about 38 known species of lampreys.  Although they are well known for boring into the flesh of other fish to suck their blood, in fact only a minority (of political disclination) do so; only 18 species of lampreys are actually parasitic.  The lampreys are a very ancient lineage of vertebrates, though their exact relationship to hagfishes, jawed vertebrates and homo sapiens is still a matter of conjecture.’

Enough now of the diatribe, better to return to the Graphical Manipulation objectives thereby avoiding further angst.  Pleased we were to see the Apple I-phone get into the act of active NO Coalition disparagement with;

Appleated

That asylum seekers had much more to consider than just their unfortunate circumstances;

Asylum Considerations

And that That pesky bloody Rat was ever ready to put his perspective on the weeks events with regard to jihadists;

Hiding Jihadists Rat

Criminal law regimes in other countries;

New Ideas Rat

That one of our new Senators has a particular view of our own Prime Winky Dill that’s not largely at variance with the rest of the population;

Psychopath Rat

And that despite all the revelations and realisations that there were actually people in this wide brown land for some 40,000 years they were a pretty unsettled lot;

Terra Nullius Rat

Who thought that if the current government could put as much effort into running the country as they put into propaganda machines, we’d be going gangbusters;

Propaganda Rat

And finally that independent and innovative thinking was not yet entirely dead in the Australian historical retrospective;

HOCS Rat

Regardless of the Rat, we wondered how the Joe (Eleventy) Hockey realised his dream of the appropriate THREE WORD SLOGAN;

The Whiteboard

The processes behind making lots of asylum seekers and their boats disappear, not necessarily from the naval radar, but certainly from the perception of the Aussie voter;

Disappearances

How one could best emulate obfuscatory linguistic manipulative lexiconical verbalisation with half-pike and twist;

Gobbledeish

And of what happens when Paul Keating’s Senate disease sporulates and infects the House of Representatives;

Unrepresentative Swill

And there you have it  . . . . . . !

AFTERTHOUGHT:  If you don’t punish politicians and their parties for lying to you, you are predetermining your treatment as a fool!

POSTSCRIPT:  All characters appearing in this work are entirely, and amazingly, fictitious.  Any resemblance to real persons, living, dead or in a zombie like state, is purely coincidental with an exceptionally high probability of being the construct of a deluded mind trying to grasp the true meaning of the political unreality of Australian politics, al la NO Coalition!  We can only gaze upon such greatness with wonderment!

 

 

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En Passant #16: Something Came Up – And Shortened the Week!


Another of life’s little divertessments arose to take me away from the keyboard and Smooth Draw 3.0 for a few days.  Should be back to full strength next week.

Take care now!  And don’t let the NO Coaliars and our Prime Winky Dill take too much off you.

In Corporate Jargonese that something would go something like this:  “Recently, the attention of the body corporate was drawn to the determined efforts of a small subsidiary group, based in the headquarters of the company, to usurp control of central management.  This attempt was being achieved by creating a small entity and then, by slow and persistent growth, expanding the size and complexity of their operation until such time that they would have achieved a size sufficient to control the company by starving a core management group of essential resources.  This would have had the effect of creating chaos in the remainder of management and the ultimate collapse of the corporation.

Adventitiously, the attempted takeover was detected in a general audit of corporate headquarters and steps have now been taken to expunge the takeover group before the corporation experienced serious and irreparable damage to its day to day operations.

Once again we can applaud the due diligence of our audit group and confidently say that the organisation is once again fundamentally entire and intent on moving forward into a bright new future.”

And in more vernacular terms:  “An exploratory Magnetic Resonance Imaging appointment identified a slow growing benign meningioma in the left frontal lobe.  Due to its growth, the age of the carrier, and the proximity of the meningioma to an essential blood supply feeding the left side of the brain (and the likely results of a blockage of the blood supply) it was decided that the most appropriate action was to have it removed.  This has now been done!”

Many thanks to the skills of the surgeon, his assistants and the lovely nursing staff at Liverpool Hospital, NSW who looked after me pre and post operatively.

In passing, I found it curious that, despite having private hospital insurance for just such eventualities, it appears that the only place that such complex surgery could be undertaken was in a Public Hospital.  It appears that our Private Hospitals don’t invest in such equipment.  What?  Doesn’t fit in with their cost/benefit/profit analysis I’d suspect.  Hmmm! Maybe that’s food for thought!

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Graphical Manipulations #89: Armies, Clowns, Sweeteners, Lies, That Bloody Rat, Statistics & Calmness!


Not much to say really, as things continue pretty much as they did when this bunch took over the government benches.  The Prime Embarrassment continues to act like a prat, the government tries to sell the unsellable to a voting public who ain’t happy with either the budget, or the government, and the weather continues to defy the sun being largely in the Northern Hemisphere.

So we’ll just let the Graphical Manipulations speak for themselves – with the occasional aside!

There’s the bright new future for all those parasites loafing on the dole because they can’t get a job;

The Green Army

Our three clowns continue to ensure that Parliament continues to be considered a farce by most of the country;

Three Clowns

The Prime Embarrassments informs us that bribing asylum seekers is de riguer;

Asylum Seeker Sweetener

And also admits what most of the Australian public already know;

Liar Liar Abbott

The bloody Rat returns with his view on bribing asylum seekers;

Return Home Rat

On the fact that retiring Liberals, having attained their lifelong sinecures, are more than prepared to display their personal views of the government;

Sexist Rat

That he is mightily pleased that Julie Bishop is brimming with exuberance vis a vis the United States;

Exuberant Rat

And that at least someone is willing to call it as it is (even if they are a foreigner) and draw attention to the overwhelming embarrassment felt by Australia’s voters;

Embarrassed Rat

And as we’ve heard so much about statistics vital for the health of our impending emergency, this statistics appears to be fairly vital to the understanding of such matters;

Abbott Vital Statistics

But overall, we know that our government is doing its very best for all of us;

Trust Us Plaque

And there you have it  . . . . . . !

AFTERTHOUGHT:  If you don’t punish politicians and their parties for lying to you, you are predetermining your treatment as a fool!

POSTSCRIPT:  All characters appearing in this work are entirely, and amazingly, fictitious.  Any resemblance to real persons, living, dead or in a zombie like state, is purely coincidental with an exceptionally high probability of being the construct of a deluded mind trying to grasp the true meaning of the political unreality of Australian politics, al la NO Coalition!  We can only gaze upon such greatness with wonderment!

 

 

 

 

 

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Graphical Manipulations #88: Hate, Rupert, Missed Bits, The Rat, Crises, Cakes, Janus, Pythons And Conviction!


I always find it nauseatingly insulting when those who, positioned in the top 10% of society, with their comfortable sinecures, and full in the knowledge that they will never want throughout the rest of their self-indulgent lives, deign to tell the rest of the populace that they should not expect equality, are ‘leaners’ not ‘lifters’, suck far too much from the public welfare purse, or are deserving of the most menial of payment for their labours.  This self-serving arrogance, supercilious condescension and amorality make such people undeserving of the slightest degree of respect, deserving only contempt.  Such people seem to have forgotten that had it not been for their forebears, a fortunate set of circumstances, or an admixture of both they would not be where they are now – in positions of power, privilege and wealth.  Such as these shame our species appellation of Homo sapiens (wise man).

And when those less fortunate than you seek to aspire, if not to equality, then at least to some degree of equity, you call it “class warfare” and invoke left wing extremism as your defence of people’s complaint of unfairness and inequity.  It is somewhat understandable then, that in such circumstances where there is no hope, only futility and fear that those in extremis may very well look out at the world in a manner such as this;

Like You Too

Thoughts of power and privilege led to consideration of our Prime Embarrassment and his gaffe prone journey around the globe.  There was some comfort that he was consulting others;

Abbot and Murdoch

And that Peta was there to ensure that the appropriate instructions were appropriately recorded and their priority noted.  There was concern at her absence when the P.E. met President Obama that the full gist of the conversation might not have been got;

Abbott Huh

Naturally The Rat couldn’t resist putting a bit of a spin on the proceedings with his take on statements made;

Complimentary Rat

On just how unproportional the proportions of wealth where apportioned;

Wealthy Rat

And on how unreliable Australians were becoming related to their reliance on welfare;

Welfare Rat

Which led to thoughts about exaggerated claims;

Exaggerated Hockey

And to exaggerations generally;

Cake Eater Hockey

Then to outright bullshit (sorry – – – moo poo);

Conservation Abbott

Which gave rise to thoughts that this whole business was becoming increasingly Pythonesque;

Monty Brandis

And that led to thoughts about politicians and the degree of courage they may hold about their convictions and, finally, to this;

Political Sinecures

And there you have it  . . . . . . !

AFTERTHOUGHT:  If you don’t punish politicians and their parties for lying to you, you are predetermining your treatment as a fool!

POSTSCRIPT:  All characters appearing in this work are entirely, and amazingly, fictitious.  Any resemblance to real persons, living, dead or in a zombie like state, is purely coincidental with an exceptionally high probability of being the construct of a deluded mind trying to grasp the true meaning of the political unreality of Australian politics, al la NO Coalition!  We can only gaze upon such greatness with wonderment!

POST POSTSCRIPT:  To whoever thought up this GM (below), I sit at your feet oh sensei sama and await the revelations of your wit!!

Loved It

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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